jazz society

Got a free entrance to The Basement. Pretty cool i must admit. The 5th house performed tonight. Their music is so soothing and relaxing. Glad I went even though I was feeling frustrated enough and tired out. Made me look further into my musical life. Encouraged me to continue working hard to reach my goal. Made me see myself more as a singer then pianist. This kinda surrounding is my kinda liking. Love the atmosphere. Good for dates.. (=
hmmm...

Had good bargains for music books as well. Had tons of free music books from uni yesterday and tonight got good price from Allans music store. (=
Tonight made me wanna start a choir again. Then again after talking about it i feel like just dropping the whole idea. Who is commited enough to join. Or rather let me say I'm not worthy enough to lead out in a christian society in song and celebration.

Which comes to the subject : ME!!!
since my 21st, I somehow turn bitchy. Words coming out of me doesn't seem as sincere as before. My patience has run dry. Me being kind? Errr.... Doesn't seem to be as so anymore. I don't mean what I say at times. Seek more attention. I easily get angry. I'm more vain. I don't seem to hide my frustration or hurt anymore. My feelings starting to over-run me. And worse of all God doesn't seem real to me anymore even though after my 21st I've been talking more to him then i ever did this year.
Good side? I'm more confident, upfront, more defensive if really necessary, singing more which makes me out spoken and bitchy, don't keep in feelings or anger(which is a good thing i think), don't look back, have good friends... (=
hmmm.... Then again I don't really enjoy seeing the new me everyday. It's scary in a way and I'm feeling proud of myself as well for where I stand at the moment.
I suppose time tells the story of life which makes the world more interesting....
(=