Swan Lake

My 1^st ballet performance which I went to. It was totally superb. Being a ballerina is every little girl’s childhood dreams. Which makes me wanna look further into performance.

I got a call right before the performance telling me that they didn’t want me for the musical (it was my 1^st musical audition so I didn’t take it too hard. I don’t even know what the musical is about). Makes me look back and think that I’m so much better directing and managing and mangling with props instead of performance. Which makes me wanna do performance even more. I’m sick of having ppl tell me that I’m not good and telling me what to do. It has always been my dream to perform on stage having crowds of ppl cheer and give flowers. It was always been my dream to finally be seen by the world instead of just being a pretty face. It’s a dream of being visible and talked about and loved. After all, nothing comes easy.

Back to the ballet. It was totally awesome. I know it’s the night before my 2 major paper later today but cousin bought the tickets before the timetable was out and I’m going to try and go to as much performances and musicals while I’m still here. The whole performance was roughly 2 ½ hours. I wasn’t bored at all and I didn’t move from my spot in my chair. Watching them dance gracefully and lightly. I’ve always fancied male dancers (ballet); their graceful movement and by the fact that they are strong and have a nice sense of dance to the music. But I just can’t stand the tights they all wear. Somehow it’s quite disturbing. The females on the other hand looked so delicate, light and flexible. I could never dance like that (I’ve done ballet before). I’m heavy and it’s not easy trying to be flexible when I’m stiff -.-!! Got a few guys who’ve tried carrying me telling me that I’m heavy when I look light (yea, thanks J. I’ll never forget that).

Summary, I’m still aiming for the stage no matter how afraid I am and rejects I get. Never give up in a fight. Always try, try and keep on trying until you die. That’s what life is all about for me. And yes, I AM definitely a career person.

(I need money before I could do anything though)

Anyways, don’t think I’ll write much tonight. Have heaps to cram in the morning before exam. I’m going to bed now.