This world is not my own

HOw many time have i been hurt..
how many times have i wonder...
how many times i keep my stand,
my word,my courage and my pride.

Why's the world s it is now,
why so many evil around,
why lie, why pretend....
why me oh yes...
y me....

A world my own...
a wonderful world,
a place with happiness,
a place where i can play a role,
a place where i can really show,
a place which i can be confident,
a place where i can find peace,
a place with no pain;
but full of love,trust and pride.

My mind is a wide place,
for love,for freedom,for enjoyment.
ppl there i trust,ppl there i meet,
ppl there whom i love and
ppl there whom i truely care.

Dreams may not seem true;
but to me it's truely a real thing,
a true thing which happens in my daily life.
I talent, a curse wat may it be
i still am clueless of it....

some may think i'm wierd,
some cool if not crazy,fun or boring.
Wats the real reason for things.
Izit coz I come from a well to do family?
Izit coz of my looks?
Izit coz they can get things outta me?
Izit coz of my outside appearence instead of the inside?

The world is full of sin,
of hatred,sadness,pain and suffering.
I care for those sufferin.
I help those who r in need.
I give a hand and share my happiness,
to those to whom i think I can cheer them out.

Love..
a strong word but at times used in a wrong way.
wat izit actually?
or rather wats wrong with me!
I do have love in me.
but i love everyone around me juz the same,
I care and feel their sadness though it's not said.

Turst...
something at which i have a problem.
ppl hurt me,ppl use me,
my childhood nightmares never seem to ware off.
But there r ppl whom i turst,
it is indeed possible for me to trust again
after a long time of suffering.
I wanna trust those whom help me,
whom care for me,
whom r themselves,
whom r open up n r juz true to me.
it may seem hard but i indeed know
whom to trust and whom not to.
I've grown wiser,
courages,open up more,
understanding more
and accepting ppl for who they are no matter wat.