Frustration? =/
Hahahahah......
Read through the comments and I know I'm turning into one bitch that has no other life but a miserable one... Hmmmm...
Read through my post and realizing I was just frustrated to the max. Uncle has been making the whole house feeling extremely miserable with his conditions. I've forgotten myself, haven't been playing music the whole week or so considering it's easter break and I just feel so trap here without my doggy or the freedom to play music whenever I want to. The piano sitting in my room with me cursing away about life. Forgetting about who I was. Who I used to be.
Wanting to change to badly so I could forget my hurtful past doesn't seem to be working. I've been going through the change for the past 4 years. I suppose since last year I've just turned into some selfish maniac who thinks only for myself for a change instead of ALWAYS thinking about others... If I were reading this 3 years ago, I suppose I'd be disgust as well... Hmmmm... Never thought you guys would think that way of me complaining the shits out of life.
Change can be bad and for my case in a way it is. I'm just trying to work myself back to God but it's extremely hard. Since I've let God go, I've turned into what you all call 'bitch', 'jerk', 'arse', 'idiot' and god knows what else.
All I can say is thanks for slapping me back on track. So lost in music that I've lost track of holding onto my old little self.
(=
posted by mya @ 7:26 pm
3 comments
3 Comments:
We don't want to know about the past. Focus on the present, what you can do is now, cherish everyone, those care about you but you push them away as enemies, and today you build yourself a statue of a sick woman. The sick needs healing, help. Help yourself by mending the broken pieces you created with others, those you know you have. Or else, you continue this way up, and be sb worse fours yrs later.
Your dad might have read many what you've written, and may have replied without telling you. Or your siblings, relatives, friends know you. And they all know, you need to help yourself to be nice and lovely. We don't want your voice, skill in playing anything. ok?
thanks.
Just including that my voice IS my everything. Sure nobody needs it but saying that it IS a part of who I am in my music life.
A change? more renovation to myself I suppose ;p
Talked about renovating yourself, how about start by reassessing your relationship with God?
I don't think you have really known Him yet.
Music, good voice, doing good, helping others, etc., cannot replace God. The 1st Commandment tells us not to have other gods before God. It is by placing God first in our lives that genuine goodness can flow from us. That's why it is the first commandment!
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